Click here to read the article from the Douglas Budget!
Adoption is a beautiful thing for the children who are lucky enough to be chosen. In a country with 5 million orphans there are many who are left behind. Children living in institutional settings are ill equipped to handle life outside the orphanage walls. Knowing little to nothing about entrepreneurship and earning a living many are left to steal or beg on the streets.
Lets help change that!!!!
I have been traveling all day. Quiet and contemplative. I pride myself on my transparency and that’s just what I intend to be…transparent. I have had a feeling of uncertainty surrounding this trip to Congo. I can feel the support and prayers sent to me from around the world. With this kind of support one would think I would feel lifted/rejuvenation, instead I can feel the rock of doubt resting firmly in my ribcage. I thought it was the loss of Daniel. The loss of the new baby. That I was afraid to return to a country that has claimed so many of my children. That I couldn’t bare the loss again. I believe the latter is the case. Don’t misunderstand me…the loss of a child is gut wrenching, cry until your lungs beg for mercy, feel your self retreat into a dusty unused corner of your mind and crouch in the shadows. You find yourself longing for the sun only to realize it doesn’t warm your face the way it used to. This has been my reality. My heart has been not only broken, it’s been crushed. Not only for the children who would have been “mine” bur for all the children who are OURS! Wren, Emery, Merriville, Daniel and Gaston are the faces, my personal reminders of a human race epidemic that we all hold the vaccine for. Africa is many wonderful things, but it is also something else..depressing. Yes I said it. The extreme poverty, the street children, the starving, the orphans. There is something that arises in all of us when faced with horror of that magnitude…fear! That uncomfortable feeling in the pit of our stomachs whenever someone mentions grief, loss or tragedy. We want to turn away, pretend it isn’t there…buy a purse, get your nails done, watch some T.V., surf the internet for trivial information on the shocking fact that Kim Kardashian is pregnant…..and you know what? I want to do those things too. I want to curl up in my bed at the end of the day and read a book while my children sleep peacefully in the next room. I want to turn away. I don’t want to get on a plane. To travel for two days with no sleep. To arrive in a country that I can’t master the language and hand out cans of formula that won’t feed enough children. To stand for photo-ops like some chump who things they can make a difference, but is actually just standing in a burning forest with an eye dropper. Knowing that I couldn’t even save my own children. But I will do just that. Get on the plane. Fly to a country I can’t fix. Bring the formula. Love on the children and pray that in some way, what I do will make a difference. I will do all of this with the rock in my chest and the doubt in my mind. I will be overwhelmed. I will cry. I will miss my family. I will feel more alone that I have ever felt. But I will…..would you?
I have had a lot of people say they don’t know how I do it……or I am so strong. Let me tell you the truth. I am not strong and there are days I can’t figure out how I am going to continue on….but somehow I always do.
Take now as an example. My husband just took all my children to town. That = down time. Down time = thinking. Thinking = tears.
I don’t (normally) allow myself to cry openly and many who know me may wonder if it ever gets to me. Let me assure you it does. I don’t know how I will ever be the same again. I am only one person and most of the time am completely and utterly overwhelmed. I know many people want to help and many do. I am so grateful to all who have opened their hearts to these children. I really can’t explain how deeply each and every donation touches me. I have seen the children you are helping. I have spent hours with the children. I know them by name and I can tell you about their personalities and backgrounds. I am invested. It floors me when others become invested too. I am so overwhelmed by your generosity. Once again I am moved to tears.
She’s amazing. Her heart is bigger than anyone’s I’ve ever met.
She started this blog with the hope of sharing our daughter’s story with the world. Like anything she does, she pours her heart and soul into it and makes dreams come true. She wanted to let people know what was going on in the Congo, a place so many here in America aren’t “directly affected by” and so easily change the subject when forced to hear what life is like in another country. She wanted to find a way to help. Today she’s helping children find forever homes, raising money for those left in the orphanage and she’s doing it for FREE!
Not Wren’s Song, it’s a real non-profit.
Well in U.S. Currency that is.
In a million other ways (which happens to be all the right ways), Sarah is rich. She is always ready to do a good deed – when it’s known or even better when no one is looking. She talks about adding to her karma-account. It’s pretty impressive!!
We’ve been together 13-years and am proud to call her my wife and best friend. We’ve been through a lot of ups and downs in that time, facing many unknowns and large decisions, but each time we manage to come out stronger. I guarantee there’s no one I’d rather have by my side than her. She’s a rock. Someone a stray animal/a stranger/friend/family member can always count on. She’s a dreamer first and foremost, who can turn that dream into a reality.
I’m glad she’s found so many children good homes and put so many people that weren’t aware of all the problems going on in direct contact with one another to make a difference. A real measurable difference! I’m glad I get to hear her scream with joy that another child is matched or someone wants to help out with donations to the orphanage.
Sarah, I hope when you look in the mirror, you see all the amazing things you’ve done and let it soak in. You’ve really gone above and beyond and the sky is the limit! I’m so proud of you!
Thanks for the ride we’ve been on, you are absolutely amazing Sarah. The world is so much better with your involvement. You are causing waves of change, starting with small/quiet ripples building to a tidal wave. Thanks for taking me along on that journey. It’s pretty awesome to tell people, you know Wren’s Song – yeah, my wife built that. She’s changing the world, one-day at a time.
I love you!
I am beyond sick and yet life has never been more amazing. I have had more healing over wrens death in the past week than I had for an entire year. I am on the path I was meant to walk. I have given so much but gotten more In return. We all talk about a greater power ( me being a quiet catholic not as much as others). We all have moments where we think poor me.i am personally struggling with that at the moment (hospital visits, blood draws and IVs).
When Wren died I thought why me……..poor me……….poor Wren…………. Poor orphans. It was those last two thoughts that pulled me through. I was not thinking about me. I tried to make a difference. I gave up my misery to something else. And it was comforting. It still hurt when I had to re- paint her nursery and take down her crib. I cried when I packed the clothes I had boughten for her into the orphanage donation bin. But I was able to open her door and from time to time even allowed myself to sit in her room……..
I have said this before…… It was Wren who has led me to everything. She led me to Congo. She led me to my two children. She led me to kinshasa and Mayal, Constant, and Seraphine. It is because of her that I had the courage to pursue helping others adopt. She has inspired so many to want to help. I even had the privilege to help reroof an orphanage that I am aspiring to help support. I met an awesome women in my home town and together we are working on starting an older child Christmas in America program. I have some amazing families who have put their faith in me to help them adopt. Such huge huge things are happening!!! I feel god has led me to this path. I feel wrens presence here. I know what I must do. What we must do. I will go where I am led…………I will do it with Wren by my side.
Wikipedia defines depraved indifference as a “callous disregard for human life” and results in death.
I have started this post several times but was unable to fully express what I wanted to say. Eric Ludy’s Video depraved indifference gave name to what I was trying to say.
We are all guilty. I can’t even count the times that someone has said (regarding whats happening in Congo) “I can’t believe they would do that to their own kind” What does that mean exactly? OWN KIND? Do they mean African? Black? Poor? The looks of pity are real. And yet no one acts……………Why??????? Because we are all so calloused that our own plight of which day care, preschool, name brand clothes, fancy car bull shit…….We don’t have time to care about the millions of men women and children who are suffering everyday. I don’t mean my roots are showing suffering. I am talking about mothers having to choose which of their children to feed suffering. Children who eat mud to feel full. Do you think they chose that life? Are those mothers beneath you? Are we returning to the day when we referred to people who weren’t like us as savages? Look back on history……….southern slavery, the Indian massacres, concentration camps. Depraved indifference kills millions everyday. I am not depraved and I refuse to be indifferent. How can we let this happen to our own kind?
No matter what your religious views are, this video has the message that everyone should hear.
I am thankful for all of my friends and family who have stood by us through all this craziness! I am thankful for my husband who holds my hands through the gun shots and can laughs about it after. I am thankful for my beautiful strong 4 year old who lights up my days. I am thankful for my son and his resiliency and easy smile, I am thankful for my baby who has been through so much and shows us more of herself everyday. I am thankful to those in Douglas who are taking care of our old dog, 5 cats (2 of whom are on daily medication) and 20 chickens! You have all gone above and beyond! I am thankful for my dad who has such a kind heart and strong spirit who is going through a 8 hour surgery today and needs prayer as well. I am thankful for love and faith felt halfway around the world. I am thankful that we are here in Congo, that we have seen what we have seen and that we chose the road less traveled so others may have a glimpse at how others live. I am grateful we have been given the chance to visit Rita’s orphanage and all the donations that have touched lives. I am thankful our hearts where open to adoption and strong enough to endure. Adoption is not for the faint of heart but I truly wish more people would open their hearts to its wonderful gifts! I am thankful despite our trials. I am grateful to walk this path I know I was meant to walk. I mean not to make others fearful but aware. Aware that where we live is the land of opportunity! Our government is flawed without doubt, but we have government. We have laws. We have state aid and even while it’s abused it’s there for those in need. We have a government thats goal is to protect it’s citizens! I am proud that I am American, yet disgraced by the fact most of us don’t see past the tips of our own manicured fingers. People are dying. Good people all over the world. Wren was one Merriville was another. We in America have enough. Yet we want more. A bigger house. A greener lawn. A name brand purse. The latest fashions. I admit that I am not excluded from this list. I want as well, and when I am strolling through a bright friendly store that offers more of what I want than what I actually need my mind is far from the plight of Africa, India, Guatemala, or even those in need in the USA. Who am I thinking of…….. Myself of course! Who else is there? It’s sad really! That if I hadn’t bought new shoes for myself where could that money have gone……who’s life would my new shoes have saved. Here in Congo walking through that orphanage I know the answer. I can still see their faces. I want my hair done. They want a meal. I want popularity. They want one person to love. I want. They need! Yet not one child asked me for one thing while I was there. No begging for treats even though there was hunger in their eyes. Not one child looked hopeful that someone was coming for them. They all know where they stand………far below iPods and cell phones……..well below dinner dates and movies. We have all heard the horror stories of adoptions gone wrong. The kid with reactive attachment disorder that ruined someones perfect family with their imperfection. I won’t lie it’s a scary topic. RAD can leave you lying awake at night worrying what if…… Those hungry eyes keep me up at night. What’s scary is there are 145 million orphans world wide. 145 million hungry eyed orphans that have learned that no one cares.